Sunday, March 12, 2017

Am I #RockingMotherhood or Just Faking It Till I Make It?

I know I've only been blogging for all of five minutes. (Ironically how long my first marriage lasted.) But somebody out here in the blogoverse loves me already. We've become fast friends and have already started designing our matching, bedazzled straight jackets.

Try not to be jealous.

If you don't already know Selena from My Rambling Thoughts, read how she rocked this motherhood challenge like it's 1999. She's deemed me worthy for this challenge and not only am I flattered, I accept my mission, like a boss. Here's the rub: I have to tell you 10 reasons I'm #RockingMotherhood, thank who nominated me, and tag someone else to keep this train rolling along. 

Ready? OK.

10. Genetics. I've passed down the good and the bad, but certainly not the ugly. While looks aren't everything, they don't hurt on this rocky road we call life.

9. Patience may be a virtue but not one mine. However, I killed it where honesty was concerned. My truthful twosome pull no punches when it comes to keeping it real. If I had a dime for every time I told them "If you tell the truth, you won't get into trouble" I'd be Oprah rich. Even without the dimes, my plan worked. My daughter and son are brutally honest.

8. My nap game is strong, so my kids have always been well rested. Now let's take a siesta.


7. I've learned to choose my battles. Yes, daughter of mine, you can braid daisy chains and hula hoop in open fields. Just promise to shave your armpits and wear deodorant. My son spent his toddler years sporting cowboy boots with shorts, immediately turning nudist the moment we were home behind closed doors. He didn't pee on the floor, so I call that a win.

 (Not my son, but they're definitely kindred spirits!)

6. I've exposed my kids to our lord and savior, Tupac. Or Uncle Pac, as we like to call him at our house.


5. I've led by example and I thank the parenting Gods that my kids are leaders and not followers. 

4. "Study or you'll have to be a stripper." Good grades and an education are key and I've pushed that down the spawn's throats from the jump. They are overachievers and their report cards have always reflected such. Parent teacher conferences are my favorite time of year. It never gets old to hear "Your child is so intelligent, mature, polite, confident, and an absolute pleasure to have in class." My husband and I always high-five on our way out.

3. One of the hardest things to do is get through this world with a sense of humor. Sometimes it's the one quality that can make or break us. I don't like to brag (yes, I do.) but I'm pretty funny. Now I'm not sure if this trait was inborn or learned. I'm guessing both, but my kids are pretty humorous creatures. Like the time my son wrote offensive messages on his sister's tampons. Or better yet, the time my daughter used lube for lotion. I may or may not have let her do it because I couldn't help myself. We still razz her about that day. "My hands are so silky!"

2. Loyalty. Death before dishonor. It would be fair to say that I don't have a family. I'm a bit of an orphan and I'm okay with that at this point in my life. Outside of my own four walls, I have nothing and I give not a single fuck. Because it's what I have inside this house that matters the most to me. My kids have adapted a ride or die mantra and it makes my heart happy. We don't do arguments and there is no such thing as going to bed mad in this house. We work it out because.....

1. I've managed to keep us all alive and if that doesn't count for something, I don't know what does. 

These 10 reasons, my friends, are exactly why I feel like I've been #RockingMotherhood for the last 20+ years. 

Thank you, Selena. What an honor. Now I'm passing my bedazzled torch flashlight to a couple more women who slay the parenting game. 

Kimberly and Rachel, I'm choosing you both. But don't feel pressured or anything. ;)
Will @BeingaWordsmith & @ourrachblogs share why they're #RockingMotherhood? I hope so. Tag, ladies.

1 comment:

  1. I finally did my #RockingMotherhood post. Thanks for tagging me. I laughed my face off doing it.