Thursday, December 22, 2016

Last Minute Christmas Shopping With Ambien

With just three sleeps left until Christmas, I decided it appropriate to share some shopping purchases brought to you by Ambien.

Sea Stone Splash Sponge Holder

Because who doesn't want a gorgeous stone holder for their bacteria infested sponge?

Finger Hands

I'm at a loss for words on this one, you guys. Perhaps this would be a great gift for your cousin who drops way too much acid?

Lucky Yodelling Christmas Pickle Ornament

What tree is complete without a pickle ornament that can yodel?

Bubble Wrap Costume

For the conspiracy theorist Uncle who is certain, that aliens are invading his innermost personal thoughts. Also a nice buy for Aunt Gladys who keeps breaking her hip.

Pooch Power Dog Poop Vacuum

For pet owners who are too cool to use plastic bags to clean up behind Fido.


Uncle Merv can finally declare he has a six pack and not be referring to his Pabst Blue Ribbon.

I once ordered a kitty condo on Amazon, hours after taking Ambien to help me sleep.
 I don't even have a cat.

Have you ever made an Ambien induced purchase? Tell me about it!

1 comment:

  1. LMAO these are hilarious. The bubble wrap costume reminds me of Dude, Where's My Car?

    I haven't made an Ambien purchase, but maybe I should, so the UPS guy & I can have a good laugh.
    You crack me up. Thanks for sharing!